Collecting Evidence and being a Spy

Evidence has been collected…

Data has been gathered…

A case has been made…

There has even been a body involved…

…Only the body isn’t dead and it’s mine!

Being close now to my first week of hospital London appointments I have been busy trying to collate as much evidence of what is going on as possible. The thing is the symptoms are all a bit strange and not always possible to provide evidence of on command. As a result, I’ve been armed this week with camera and notebook to record everything that may be relevant. To taking pictures of having one leg that looks like it belongs to a snowman while the other simultaneously looks like it belongs to a smurf (I have extreme circulation issues) to photographing oximeters showing oxygen levels in the 80s to my pulse changing from 62 to 190 from simply standing up. I also have alarms going off every 6 hours to remind me to check my blood pressure. I am basically seeing what it would be like to be famous and paparazzied. The real reason though is I’m determined to hopefully get as many answers as possible in a few weeks. The only thing is I’ve become so used to many things that shouldn’t be normal it is hard to know what is a symptom and what isn’t. This has caused some interesting discussions when I’ve been in trouble for something that should have been a 999 call resulting in me ignoring it all and wondering why I feel really horrible. Most doctor trips and many conversations with my Mum have now led to an ever increasing list of when I must call an ambulance.

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To keep with the crime theme I have also been electronically tagged this week! The only difference being my electronic tag is attached to my wrist, not my ankle (and I can take it off). Despite the fact I really didn’t want to I have finally given into Telecare. This is a system in which I have to wear this tag at all times which has a button on it that I can press and also a device that can detect a sudden change in space so detects if I fall down suddenly. From either of these, an automatic call is made to a centre, which will call an ambulance for me if I’m unable to (unconscious or can’t get to a phone) and will also alert other people on a list of contacts they’ve been given. It’s a pretty clever system and if I was about 9 I definitely would have pretended I was a spy with this device on my wrist (ok… I might of anyway!). Only downside is nobody has yet seen the market to make these look vaguely fashionable…

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In other news, I managed to, for several days, trick my body by deviating from normal events. I’m no longer allowed to eat meals because the results are disastrous. Instead, I’m now on a diet of eat-a-very-small-snack-an-hour. It worked for several days and then my stomach cottoned on that it was being tricked and is now deciding not to comply! I’m currently awaiting to see if a new cocktail of drugs has been found for me to combat this.

I’ve also been issued with morphine at home so a significantly less number of hospital trips as a result of pain lies ahead. Yay!

The other medical event of the week has been a referral to physiotherapy with home visits. I’m not too sure how long this will take.

Non- medical related, I got my results back from another two essays this week and simultaneously got my best and worst degree results so far. Luckily nothing too disastrous and as long as nothing goes too badly with my dissertation I’ve got my fingers crossed to graduate with distinction. However, if I’m honest I feel a pass shall be a good enough achievement as I’m down to about an hour only a day of productive study time.

However, the biggest achievement of the trip goes to my trip to Tesco’s! I may have only managed an aisle and gone at a time when there were no queues but this was a massive achievement for me and nothing disastrous happened in the process! Who knows next week it could be Ben Lomond!

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